week 1 of school
so fun and enjoyable w/o labs.
slept alot as usual.
i hav sleeping disorder.

played volley on fri night. so fun!
xiying and i had to act as ivy and guomin (2 ivps) cox they couldnt make it.
n this time when im behind, i had to defend. abit different.
went ayer rajah market to eat after tt.
fish soup! and sugar cane drinks. naiseeeeeeee.=)

hope week 2 of sch will be better. thou i noe it will not be.

-

yest was nus-ntu showdown at BBCSC.
yay. my team mates were awesome.
and we made it to 3rd.
no photos. didnt bring camera.
maybe tags on fb.

-

Stopped believing

cry
i found myself crying in the middle of the conversation.
i just couldnt control it.
you said sorry to have left me when i was so young. and led to my bad childhood.
but deep down i know i will never forgive you.
you said no matter what.... (i didnt care much what you said next because i chose not to listen anw)
you said whatever happened in the past, you are my daughter.
CRAP. my MISFORTUNE.

i must somehow thank you bcoz if u haven hurt me that much i wouldnt be this strong and independent.

and you nv learn. you have no idea how ashamed i am to have you as my dad. totally.
stop telling me you can help me in this and that. stop telling me that u have a proposal for my post grad studies. stop. because i know they are all lies. LIES.
21 years of lies. i remb when i was young, you told me i will nv have to worry because you had it all planned for me. i was elated. when i was 18, the day came. i needed your help. you said you couldnt help beacuse.... (you and your excuses).

and now im alr 21, you are still telling me you can help. you have it all planned. im not a kid anymore. please dun make my life anymore terrible. my life is terrible enough now. dun give me hopes that i can do this and that. because i know at the end of the day, i just have to do it myself. and thats why i said, THANK YOU because w/o the abandon, i wun be this independent today.

i am and will be happier without you.