WOOOHOOOOOOOO!!!
exams ended! finally.

went vivo to celebrate our dear small cheryl's bday. Dian xiao er. =)
came back hall to pack my stuff.
THERES A PIG LYING ON MY BED NOW. OMG.

chop chop pack pack. i wan2 go HOME. and orh orh. yawns.
supper tonight!! woohooo.

LOOK AT THE TIME NOW!
its 10am.
BUT I AM AWAKE!!
hhaha.
so wipe off those thoughts that you ALL have that i cant wake up before 2pm okay!
humph.

ok anyways. actually im quite tired.
scared will fall asleep later mans.
final sprint! wooHOOOOOOO!
in approximately 25 hrs time.
i will be FREEEEE!!!
AND.. most importantly, 68 hours?!
WE WILL BE FLYING.

ok enuff of excitement. too much for a monday morning.
so shag yest. glued to facebook can! O.M.G. la.

i have a million things to do after tue last paper.
pack my rm, pack my luggage, go out blah blah blah.
i think i need a to-do list. haha. JUST LIKE EXAMS.. LOL!

1) celebrate cheryl's bday.
2) pack my room
3) pack my luggage (this is like mission impossible. OH NO!)
4) shop
5) Bowl
6) .... and many many more.

countdown countdown.
super EXCITED. oh mans.
weeeee. WOOOHOOO. 4 more days!! 4 more days.

baby baby, our HONEYMOON!! haha. -__-

im like on holiday mood now mans. come on leti, CAN U PLS FOCUS?!!!
one more paper, tue.

bowled on fri. WOOHOO.
n today.. eh. ON FACEBOOK!! haha. damn lame.

LULU, cheer up!!! dun be luuudy looody mooody okay!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to yoU, yOU, YOUUUU!!!!
love u lots lots deep deep many many.

remb our dates this weekend and next 2-3 WEEKS huhhhhh!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------

i have 3 MORE papers. i cant wait for them to be over.
i wan2 FLY! like.. NOW NOW NOW.
ok. i have some crap sp1203 tmr. (like as if u noe what module is this. fyi, its some effective com mod.) yes, its my core. yes CORE. OMG rights.
Fri dosage form design.
next tues- pharmacostatistics.
then WWOOOOHOOOO! end of exams!! (= ELATION.

oh oh. must start packing up my rm. shitties. did i say.
i FORGOT to apply for vacation stay and GG la. must shift OUTTT. omg.
i have a a whole mountain of things in my rm cannn!
oh i think i said it b4. ehh now tt i remb.
paiseh. confusedkid88@hotmail.com is coming back.

ok. its like.. near 4am now. n i think i REALLY seriously need to orh orh(SLEEP!!).
ok. tata everybody.

thou studying is a chore.
exams are fun, dun u think so?
(my neighbour, Annie, 2008)

yes yes. enjoy exams.
this is SO optimistic and im just so NOT used to being optimistic.

COUNTDOWN: 8 MORE DAYS to saying BYE BYE SINGAPORE.

WALAU.
TULAN.
study so hard for whatt. SHITTTYYYYY ASSS.
cant even keep myself calm durin the paper.
what the ffff is wrong with me.

cant get over me. one down.
4 more.

leti needs motivations/encouragements to move on.
leti is gettin more and more irritated.
ARGHHHHH. i wan to kill somebody.
can i can i??

14 days have passed.
all i asked for is a simple "happy birthday" from you.
but until today, you didnt.
disappointed.
i dun think im asking too much.

war begins tmr.
it will last for 10 days.

prob the thing abt mugging that we hate to the core is having so many things to revision within a week. 5 modules within a week. OH MAN. of cos. it's impossible, and i am so not gona make it mans. as the 1st paper approaches, you find yourself in big shit stress. oh man. the fear causes the stress and the stress causes the fear.

BUT... the worst thing abt mugging is to grow fat. i prob DIDNT exercise at all ever since recess week started. shits. i dun wan to wake up the next morning to find myself a FAT woman, with huge, enormous belly bulging out, FAT elephant thighs(bigger than ever), big face swollen with fats and swamped with pimples (OH SHUCKS. pimple outbreak!!) and dark and BIG eyebags(like as if i havent slept for weeks)!! what a monster.

and of cos... i didnt evolve into the monster that i just descibed. I AM STILL A HUMAN-LOOKING girl.
but this ridiculous evolution is possible if this goes on. ARGHHH!

n shit i didnt get a room for vacation. i will prob die shifting my stuff out.
thanks for ur help!!=)

COUNTING DOWN: 15 more days.

in approximately 6.5 hrs. im gg to extract my wisdom tooth!!
(really hope can take it out, heard that when it's swollen they cant remove it.
like HUHHH. why? pls mans.)
woohoo. stupid idiot ^@#$%^$%$#% get out of my mouth.
made me cannot sleep properly, cant study, cant eat properly. =(
been swallowing the fish in my porridge, bread, etc.
can only keep flood myself with milo.
MY SAVIOUR mans. MILO!!

im gona have my wisdom tooth/teeth extracted, this fri or sunday. i decided.
they have been giving me ALOT of problems. =(
very pain.

leti

i need to learn to STOP sleepin so much. really. its taking up alot of my time. HOW. i need an alarm clock that rings every single min.
i guess THAT will be good.
can you believe it? i can sleep for 4 hrs with my head resting on the table. i'm not even lying now lehh. OMG rite.

just had dinner. yummy yum. the otah is good. but the egg is so WATERY, i thinks its half boiled egg la, not steamed egg. haha. the herbal SOUP is YUMMMMMMMYYY! n the green bean soup- i think i had 3 bowls.

i shall take a break now. b4 i attempt my stats tutorial.

leti

oh man. im 20 alr. RAH.

thanks to all the 5th-floorers, farah, A blk guys, and some of the E blk girls who appeared at my door on my birthday at 12am. THANKS!! *awaits all the tak glam pics- with cake on my face -___-* THANKS VAL for the cake!!

thanks to lulu, cheryl and veron for celebrating my bday at vivo sushi tei! =) thanks for the BRIGHT RED presents.

thanks to soccer and volley girls. for the bday song. haha.

and thanks to mh, cy and irvin for the usual supper night. we had supper part 1- tau huay (WEEEEE my fave!! yum. thinking of it makes me hungry) and late night shoppin at mustafa. so tiring. didnt noe mustafa is SO big. Supper part 2/breakfast at ECP MAC.

thanks to dad, mum and dex for the sakae sushi celebration.
reallyyy seems like my bday dinners are all jap food. HAHA.

and thanks to all those that i didnt mention above for all ur bday wishes and gifts.
___________________________________________________________

2 more weeks to exams. =( rah! i will take YOU now ONE BY ONE.
duno what i do over the weekend. very tired. shall turn in early tonight.
nights pple.

leti

just had trg. tired. i think im getting old. oh mans.

need to train hard hard. setting esp. roars. OH MAN. my setting is so lousy now, LOUSIER THAN lousy. =((

yes. skip nov. dec COME!!

leti

yawns.
dfd pract test just over. 30 qns in 40 min.
-__-

so tired. so NOT used to be sittin upright on my bed at 1020am! haha. usually i would be dead asleep. haha. yes. DEAD. i think i shall take a nap now. do some tut b4 i head for trg later.

yes. dun be surprised. im gg for trg. HAHA. its gona be my 1st volley and handball trg in these coming 3 days b4 we break for exams. (at least nt my 1st soccer trg la. i went for PT okayy!!) before we break for exams. means its the last trg as for sem 1. haha. promise will work hard when holidays come. =)

and YEAHHHH!! tickets booked!! weeEEEEEEEE!! NO more msia and indo. no more bus and ferry. we are FLYING!! *elation* i wana skip exams. and go str into december.

leti

shitties. this is so freaking disgusting.
not high up, soaring.
neither is she the worst.
neither is she safe.
left hanging in the air.
its the "calling" that she has been constantly receiving.
this "calling" comes with great load of burden and of cos, stress.
always promising an imaginary friend that there will be a transformation tmr.
but to realise that its always (n+1) days later. just not today nor tmr.
when will the day come?

oh freaking shit. tmr gt dfd pract test.
*hair is in a mess. just woke up, what-shud-i-do look. panic!!*

leti

i caught my fave movie, HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL THREE.
i think i am a BIG BIG fan of high school musical seriously!!
so sweet. awwwwwwwww.



WEEEEeeee. this weekend sucks mans. i keep sleepin esp TODAY!! wth. but ok la. i think i am super tired. i really need to get my spects repaired or whatever.

leti

stoooopid dfd test. so tricky n digusting.
im in some rm in sch lib now. fb-ing, blogger-ing, msn-ing. so bored.

today is dex's bd!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!
love you lots lots!
*nt tt u will see it anyway*

im quite lookin forward to celebration later, if there's any. haha. can u hear that i'm feeling HUNGRY? haha. ok enough of craps. gtg!! tata pple.

leti

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cried
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie
Is made up on your side

When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it okay
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do
Reminds me of you
And the clothes you left
They lie on the floor
And they smell just like you
I love the things that you do

When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it ok
I miss you

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were
Yeah, yeah

And all I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I do I give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me
Yeah

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear will always get me through the day
And make it ok
I miss you

When you're gone
By Avril Lavigne

28 oct
i'm NOT bimbo. im just blurr and enthusiastic. HAHA. i rushed back to hall, so that i can make it for PT at 6pm. i was quite motivated and wanted to train, yes, like TRAIN. all changed. with my nicee volley shoes, fbt shorts and "chui" shirt (so that i wouldnt mind it being soaked with sweat). shitt! its 610pm, and im late, AGAIN! but when i reached the lobby, there wasnt any touch rug/soccer girl ard. *panic* so i decided to use jr's phone to call whoever i can call. after abt 5 min, i found out that.. PT IS AT 9PM!!! from two friends walkin into the lobby. yes of cos.. pple there were laughing at my stupidity and bimbo-ness. whatever u call it.

yest was a totally shag-out day. i mean yest NIGHT. OH MAN. we did circuits. sucks.
1) sprint up the kr-sheares slope
2) launches (is that how you spell?) down the slope.
3) push-ups
4) sit-ups
5) step up
6) ...
7) ...
8) ...
9) superman!!

all these.. X20, X20, X30, X40, X50.
so if u do ur math, its 160 of push-ups, sit-ups blah blah blah.
okay, whatever. after yest's night pt, i reaise i am so
weak can! so unfit. really was struggling to finish them. but.. all thanks to encouragements from the soccer/touch rug girls. we completed them TOGETHER.

and yes.. my muscles are aching now. oh man. =((

there's test this fri. need to study.
i woke up at 230pm. JUST in time for my lab reports review thing at 3pm. haha.
and tt explains why im so energetic now! =)

ok. tata.

leti

was at the bus stop. and i received a message from someone. Lets call this person, M.

M: busy today? wan2 have dinner together today?
me: i just left house. dun think so.
M: ok la always a waste of time asking you. take care la.
me: K.

WALAU. really pissed can! what waste of time. waste of time then DONT message me la. DONT ASK. if u think saying these 3 words make u feel better. u can say 100 times. 1000 times. DO I LOOK LIKE I CARE? idiot.

i wan2 eat tau huay... cravings.

leti

24th OCT
chilled out at sushi tei at holland village.
with other 14 pharmacy friends. sia la. so many pple.
anyway.. did an art work (with a little help from turtle). niceee not?? haha.



then went shoppin n chitchat with liwen and veronica. CHAT SO MUCH SO MUCH. think enough to compensate what i didnt say for the months. HAHA.
camwhore, just a little=)



sian la. thot after such a long day, finally can go hm rest. guess what? i actuallyy forgt my keys. i left it in hall. OMGG. panic can!! called sis, bro, mum and dad. NOT A SINGLE SOUL pick up my call can. waited for quite some time b4 the door was opened. well.. at least im home now, im in ONE piece, to blog. today was good- a day for me to chill n relax after two weeks of non-stop working, on lab reports, poster, presentation blah blah.

super tired. i shud go sleep. yawns.

leti

im super duper fuper guper huper TIRED. oh man. UV lab report is killing me. seriously.

i have like 4 more compounds to account for. and LOOK AT THE TIME NOW!! its alr 115am la.i can go and die alr.

had sp1203 presentation today. n my classmates said i flashed cheeky smiles while presenting. I DIDNT OKAY!! but anyways.. i hope i didnt screw this up. =)

sp1203 group 6 POSTER presentation.








yeahhh!!! tmr is fri. happy happy happy. finally can take a break from all these shitties. ok i need to go back to my shit- UV lab report.

leti
*eyelids getting REALLY heavy*

it was a stressful and tiring week. really g.g. lor. seriously.
fact sheets, argumentative essays, surveys, posters, presentation really took up AOT of my time. super sian.

heard from my friends. some unfair judgements from a tutor. at least nt mine. heng.
THAT particular tuor kept comparing us with arts students. hello... they only have to attend sch only like how many days in a week?? hello... their curriculum is different from us right. there is a reason why we are so ******* stucked in science right. and i dun see anything wrong with our profession, MY profession. do u have something against pharmacy? pls respect our profession. And we have 5-6 modules per sem. we dun pay 3000+ bucks per sem just to do your module okay which is full of crap anyways. and if u have to critise our work, im perfectly fine with it. becox that's perhaps how we can learn too. BUT pls do not beat abt the bush and "shoot" (and insult) us. hello.. who's the bimbotic one. pls stop forcing ur beliefs on us. argumentative essays are suppose to allow us to express our stand in something and substantiate it with evidence. DONT tell us what our opionions shud be.

next week, i have like pharmacostats test, pharmacostats lab test, and TWO lab reports to submit. poster, presenation. wahhh. pissed.

ok. enough of boring sch work. who who wants to club next friday??? double o.

OH OH. something exciting!!! (at least. something better than the boring sch) there was MEGA SALE in nus! wahhh. cheap cheap lelong lelong. cosmetics, clothes, phones, blah blah blah. nahh.. i didnt but anythin. if i really have to buy something, i would buy sleep and rest.

ok i gg to take a nap. slept at 6am this morning. =(
panda-ed.

deadlines deadlines.
damn alot of things to do.
why am i here... precrastinatin.

even thou im alr year 2. i seriously didnt grow to like sch.
im doin it becox i noe i have to n for some other reasons which i prefer nt to disclose so openly.

i have the right to my own privacy. n blog is certainly not the place where i can be honest, for as much as i want myself to be.
after all, this is an open blog. HAHA.
its kinda hard to juggle between complaining, sharing my life on this blog and keepin my privacy.

leti

i just cant stand that someone.
so irritating.
stop tellin me about your r/s stuff. so stupid n boring.
come on, im nt jealous, n im not envious that u HAD a gf.
but im just pissed that u come complainin abt this and that.
what "im that kind of person... blah blah blah"
who cares abt which kind of person you are.
"i think she still has feelings for me. she just feel guilty that she left me."
COME ON LA. how old are you alr. if she choose to leave u, means she DUN LOVE u anymore right and she prefer another guy (maybe? possibly?) to you right.
STOP HOLDING ON TO FALSE HOPES AND WAKE UP!
she left u n its O.V.E.R. over.
suck.
really cant stand this kind of guys. oh man.
disappear can.
you can return to ur "i think miracles do happen" land and what so ever, none of my biz.

leti

i really tried my best. but why is it still... like this. so demoralising can. mayb when i stop trying, things may get better. WTH.


i am super mad at her. VERY mad at her.
she thinks she's the only one in pain.
she thins she's the only one suffering.
she thinks i am fine.
she thinks i can cope.
she thinks i can do everything myself.
she thinks i am fine.
she thinks i am a strong girl.
she thinks i am self centred.
she thinks i am this and that, like whatever!
but.. i am NOT.

from the day you chose this path, dear you, i lost you. or rather you lost me.


busy busy. with new goals to be accomplished, how am i gona do it. you tell me. you tell me! rahh.

leti

i have not given up.

leti

i just read ur blog, n its really affecting me alot.
i tried to contain my tears but i cant...
i noe i dun use to be so emotional.

you have changed. i have changed.
things are so different now that i cant accept it.
i am seriously hurt by you.
but what can i do...

i really wan to be alone now. so pls leave me alone.

times when u go down down and just down.
upset over every single thing in life.
nv been able to pick urself up.

freak. sports camp just ended. n i just disfigured myself with blue blacks everywhere. one on my head. MANY on my legs. disgusting. will upload photos when i feel like.

the last time thethreeses was updated was like... eons? haha. i shall take this honour to do so. ya right honour. haha.

yest went to bowl with my friend at bukit batok, westwood bowl. =) had fun bull-shittin and practising. secret training we had. then went farmmart to eat seafood. haha. as for today... went toa payoh hub to walk while my godpa settled his work stuff. then off to parkway to buy my mum's bd gift. (*cross fingers* hope she will liek it) ate sakae sushi for dinner. super full la. yes, its PUKING full. oh man. damn.

ok. gtg. tired. pple, take care. see ya soon!

brainy.

this will be my last post.

i've been thinking through for quite some time. i just want more privacy to myself. im not used to sharing things with people anymore. n it's hard for me to pen down how i feel without people asking me what's wrong. to some of u, i may have been a mysterious/weird/watsoever person, the kind u cant grab hold of. n u know that i've been keeping things from u and i've no intention to tell. so what's the point in writing. i'll say it out when i want to. u dont have to ask/guess/worry/watsoever. thanks for being considerate and patient toward my absurdity. n im really sorry that ur the only one alive in this blog now. u may choose to continue or end it.

GONE.

gone were the days
the days where we would have small talks before sleeping.
the days where we would bicker over the smallest thing in the world.
the days where we would shop like nobody's business.
the days where we would catch fantastic plays or last-minute movies.
the days where we would reminisce childhood events.
the days where we would flock to the mega sales.
the days where we would bake ugly muffins/cupcakes/watsoever.
the days where we would eat at posh restaurants n regret eating after that.
the days where we would be late for almost everything.
the days where we would pig out anytime, anywhere, any o how
the days where we had fun together.

those were the days.

i believe i can be a HAIRDRESSER =)

yesterday i helped my little devilish cousin to cut his hair. couldnt believe that he actually allowed me to cut it. he doesnt let anyone cut his hair and he's afraid of it but i guess my beauty has won him over. HAHA! it was my FIRST time cutting somebody's hair. i was so nervous!! n worst of all, he couldnt sit still. i had to hold him down in order to cut it. it was like battling with the bull but....in the end, i won. HA! he seems fond of his new hair now thou it's a little girlish. u cant blame me right? i wasnt that skilful and i didnt know it would turn out this way. HEHE.

TAH-DAH!!!! here's my artwork =) the first pic is BEFORE and the second pic is AFTER. the contrast wasnt that obvious actually.



i also did some baking in the evening with my sis. the goodies were meant for her colleagues. everything seemed to be screwed up by me. HA. i tot they would be awful but her colleagues said they were NICE! =D

finally found time to blog. at the expense of my sleep mans.
seriously, and im nt kidding when i say this, i didnt sleep last night.
what was i doing then?
rushing project.
this is not gona be the last one, im telling you. its gona be the same next week because i have another proj due next next tue. RAHH.
Ok. leti leti leti, accept this life mans.
dun whine dun whine dun whine.
=) anyways, life has been okay for me. not bad not bad.

i apologise if i haven had time for you. been really busy.
hope you all understand.
will spend more time with you guys when evil auntie exams are over.
then we can go K thru the night, supper, spend the night chattin, play mahjong and many many other activities. oops. n oso sports. (almost forgot abt our healthy lifestyle)
most importantly, we are gg overseas right. arent we? (=

okays. enough enough. im gona concuss for a while. good "night"!

brain

finally, i can take a break.
~phew.

but this is temporary only. shit mans.
i need a LONG break.
i so wana run away from everything.

brain

i watched a play yesterday with my sis. it was a captivating play with a brilliant ending. it was all about the sins that we, human, would commit. the play was shown at Jubilee Hall, Raffles Hotel. instead of the typical theatre hall, the place is like an old-fashioned theatre. it is so rare to watch at these kind of places nowadays. i love it! therefore, i strongly recommend this play to u ppl out there but i think today is the last day of the play :x
oh well...i'll make up for it by recommending another play -- The Pillowman :D




my NEW obsession -- SHOES!

im getting extremely obsessed with shoes and bags lately. i have been splurging on them. felt so guilty but i just cant stop myself. or maybe i didnt wanna stop at all :x i saw a renovation sale at aldo after the play. everything was so CHEAP!(consider the quality and designs they offer!) i have the urge to buy everything off the shelves. luckily, i didnt. i just bought ONE pair of red heels. im so proud of myself for curbing my strong desire from getting all the heels but i cant believe i bought a red one. it is just not ME to get it in red (here comes my dissonance). well...i guess it is really pretty that is why i got them right?? n i thought i would just stop there but i think my poor, little mind got overpowered by the mighty, evil monster in me. in the end, i psycho-ed my sis to buy a few pairs so that i could wear hers :x i didnt mean it but i just cant help it seriously :x n i saw this extremely nice sneakers at nine west. it is really gorgeous and the price is even drop-dead. others might consider it very cheap but i just cant afford it right now due to the past few extravagant spree. if there are any kind souls out there who would wanna buy it for me, i seriously dont mind :P okay, enough of shoes. it is making me going bonkers.

i'm getting as whiny as a baby.
i dont used to have this kind of feeling.
it seems like i'm overwhelmed by it.
i'm at a lost, like a child in a strange environment.
i used to think that i'm capable of handling my own matters and emotions.
but i guess i'm wrong. things arent that simple.

i didnt say i wasnt affected.
i just hid it well huhh.

the world isnt just abt you.
can you pls wake up, n start sparing a thought for others.

when will this over mans.
have so much work to do.
when can i STOP catchin up and be on par with the lectures.
soooooon soon.

brain

有很多时候我想要放胆的去做某些事，但我胆小的心却阻止了我。
好担心自己会后悔，会怨天尤人，会占不到便宜。。。也许就这样惹恼了姐姐。
她让我觉得自己还没长大，还处在经不起风浪的阶段。也许是真的吧。
咳，我这反复无常的心，真不知该怎么办啊！
我也拿它没折。

sorry your application to dentistry will not be considered because you already had an interview with us last semester.

there goes my last hope.

leti
=(

oh mans. hw can i be that blur.
cant stop blaming myself.
i just missed, or shld i say i missed it long ago.
the CAT E application.
*pls kill me*
there goes my 2nd chance.
rahh.
21 feb lehhh. now alr like.. 28 feb!
*&^%$#$%^&*!!!

all i can do it to wait for a reply from the office of admissions.
emo nemo now mans.

leti=(

am i bein excessively emo or am i just sad.
sometimes, its really hard to understand myself.
haha.
i hid it too well huhh.
too well.

tired. but i cant sleep.
suck it in and move on mans.

leti.

*feels like smashing my laptop*
i'm angry.
i'm angry with every single thing in my life now.
rahh! no point telling, pouring because it doesnt help right.
because i know only i can help myself now.

i just want to lock myself in my room now. avoid everything, everyone.
i'm tired of smiling when i really don't feel like.
so just leave me alone.
LEAVE ME ALONE.

brain

its fri evening alr. hai. and, i just woke up.
can you believe it?
i did nt wake up from an afternoon nap. its from yesterday.
i slept more than 12 hrs cannn.
wells, its either i'm really tired or i'm a pig. ha.
but i dont deny it always feels good to wake up from sleep.

recess week next week. yea.

later or shld i say now got ihg closin. duno if i shld go.
shall decide later.

leti

these 2 weeks have been much of an emotional rollar coaster for me. elation when we won and depression, right now, when we lost. it was so close.

it was like volleyball, sch work, lab reports, volleyball again, and physio exam. but i never once complained nor did i give up. i wasnt exactly stressed up, instead i was determined to bring every single hurdle that i was approaching down. there were moments when my workload was piling but i never once wana escape, nv gave up.

to where i left in the last entry. we won eusoff hall. with 2-0. (25-12, 25-11) we were overwhelmed with joy that we topped our group and were going to the semis. first time i felt, my encounter with volley in life wasnt a failure. that was a wed, 13/02/08. i thought this was going to be a milestone, a turning point. just when i had hopes.. it had to go.

and the day before yesterday, 19/02/08, we played the semis. it was a crucial game, our ticket to the finals. i'm sorry to say, we lost. it was best of 5 sets. and we lost 2-3. 1st set we won with 25-21. 2nd set our opponent won with 16-25. 3rd set we won 26-24. 4th set they won 25-13. n the final set we lost 13-15. now u noe why i said, it was so close. spirits were high, n i would proudly say that my team nv gave up, we fought till the very end. we were fightin with them, neck to neck. every point was hard-earned and we cheered for every point like we won the finals. but we still lost. tt last set 13-15 ended just like that. it cost us our ticket to the finals. i really couldnt take it. i broke down on the court. yes, i broke down. fell hard on my knees. i fell so hard. i was defeated. this time, it hit me so hard that i almost couldnt pick myself up. at that moment, i realised.. i'm just a bad loser who cant take failures after all.

to supporters who were there, sorry, did our best. i know they wouldnt be readin this because they dont and wont know this blog but its alright. i noe my team wont be readin this, thats why i was being more frank with my emotions and you guys here.

today is the finals. but its not us playin. so sad. it could have been us playin tonight. but well, we will come back stronger, next time.

i know to many of you reading this, you might just find that i'm being dumb, stupid, irrational, childish, and what so u have to say: its just a game, a sport, its nt even a big big event. then let me tell u this, if u say so, u still dont know me. you dont hw much, how much volleyball meant to me, this time. i never fought so hard for a volleyball game.

but i'm alright now. too sad, so tired, to even further depress myself. there were just too many "what ifs" and "if onlys" running through my mind. i wouldnt wan to go into details abt the game, for more information, pls refer to www.kentridge.nus.edu.sg.

brain.

just an update on yest's volley match against RH(Raffles Hall). WE WON! woohooo! 25-6. 25-11(i think). so win 2 sets which makes it 2-0. next game is on wed, which is tmr. 6pm. against EH(eusoff hall).

stress cann! this sat oso gt IFG(inter-faculty games) volley. the whole day. gt field trip oso. clash clash CLASH. sian totally. mayb i will just skip field trip since its optional.

ok. i'm off to mugging. next wed got exam!! all the best to u all having exam too. jiayou.

for info on ALL my hall's ihg, u can refer to our webby: www.kentridge.nus.edu.sg
u may find some articles written by me too! ok la. only 2. haha.

brain

i'm sry if there were any moment i neglected you. but you know, best friends are friends who feel comfortable even when our friendship is at the lowest peak. because we all lead our own lives n deep dwn, we know we both have each another.

although we're not always physically there but im sure emotionally we're there for each other. at least thats the faith i hold.

compromise cant always be the central of our friendship. because we may have compromised understanding and the opportunities to get to know each other better. but tt doesnt mean we shouldnt compromise. i think its abt balance. i cant tell you hw much to give. but definitely, its nv easy to draw a clear line. its the uncertainty things in reality hold.

if theres such thing as blind faith, i have that in you. i trust you.

the above applies to relationship.

brain. =)
*volley on MONDAY! 1st game.

time flies real fast. n there, cny n vday. it just feels that i'm gona skip cny for vday. its like near to half of the sem is gone. soon, exams will come. work is piling. i MUST start. =) haven gone hm since duno when.

sch has been alright. time table is still quite okayy. nthin can be worse than last sem la. at least this sem these no 8am to 8pm days. the modules that i'm taking this sem are rather interesting. modules this sem- physiology, pharmacy practice, Biochemistry, changing landscapes of singapore and cosmetics & perfumes. 5 modules in total. must learn to love what i'm doing. which i think i do because.. lab work is super fun cann! we learn hw to dispense. from mixing powders to making capsules. hello hello, its not like using machines or what okayy. its all manual work. so filling 6 capsules of 200mg is no joke. so this is my "baby" after 3 hrs of first lab work.


and i got A+, for both! hooray!

and in an attempt to encourage and surprise my team mates, i abused the privilege given to me.


heh heh! volleyball "victory" pills. cool not?

i'm left with 2 sports- touch rug and volleyball. been really emotional these few days. crying for one full hr is no joke man. left my eyes swollen for 2 whole days. when pple asked i just said, "no la. ehh. inflammation. contact lens." been reflecting and throwing out alot to my soulmate. ^_^ leti seriously needs to stay moree focused. been so tired. a classic e.g. was last wed. decided to study and do my tutoials after my trg. so there! bathed. coffee, books all ready on the table. i read "after the development..." the next time i noe it was already morning. need to go for 8am lecture. -___- and fyi, i drank TWO big cups of coffee. looks like caffeine doesnt work on me, maybe coke light works BETTER. ;) it isnt easy gettin to noe this new side of me. i didnt realise i changed. been lockin myself up in my A514 rm. avoiding the crowd, my neighbours, my friends. even when i go pantry, go bf, dinner or whatsoever, i made sure i avoided pple. i will NOT use the lift and use the stairs instead so that i wun meet pple in the lift? i will go dinner at weird timing, to avoid my blk. i will go back hall later, missing the first bus, so that i can sit alone in the bus. i'm not intentionally attracting attention or asking for sympathy, i think i just want time to myself. i noe it sounds selfish, esp to those ard me, who are concerned abt me, love me lots. but yeaa. i do have mood swings right. i cant always be a giver. i cant always be an angel. its just human nature. dun u agree? its okayy u dun, becox it doesnt matter to me anymore.

touch rug tmr. carnival-based.
volleyball, 11 feb-against RH. 13 feb-against EH.
semis and finals will be held indoor.
i'm off to muggin. leti wants to be a mugger this sem.

brainy.

23 jan 2008
three 5th floor girls went to do laundry.
unfortunately, got terrified by 5 2nd floor guys.
BLUE outnumbered PINK.
shaving cream n eggs on their hair, and body parts. YUCK.

i just came back from trg at that time.
3rd n 5th floor girls wanted to save them, we launched an ATTACK!!
i was a little reluctant to participate, to the extent that i put a note on my door that says "hello. spare me tonight as i'm damn tired. and do NOT wish to be agitated. thanks." but then again, i have nthin to lose. i was smelly, after trg. even if the guys were to do anythin to me, i have nothin to lose. i'm gona bathe anyway.

there, we called out girls from 5th floor.
secretly, walked dwn the stairs to 3rd floor- to find 3rd floor girls, combine strength.
it was scary because we had to pass-by 4th floor-BLUE territory.
yeaaa! made it to 3rd floor. gathered all the girls on 3rd floor.
counted! approx 22 girls.
now, the challenge was to find out where were those guys torturing OUR girls. after much effort to hear, its 4th floor. we took the lift up and cornered those guys- both the group who was torturing OUR girls and the other who was watching. POOR THING. it was an obvious PINK WINS! too bad to the blues.

i'm sure we are soo gona get it from the guys tonight, tmr. i believed so. i better be on guard.

meeting later. =) i better dun get caught, on my way back to hall. *cross fingers*

brain.

i'm damn scared noww lar.
apparently, 30 min more to 12am.
PINK & BLUE officially starts. it will last for a week.
fyi, PINK & BLUE is a game played in hall blocks- battle of the sexes.
so lets say 4 pink-s meet 5 blue-s, blue wins. pink-s must subdue. vice versa.

let me give a few historical examples.
girls got handball glue on their hair.
girls were grabbed and dragged into the toilet-TORTURE!
guys gt their urine "reflected" back at them when they pee early in the morning.
some had butter and milo shower.
woke up and found all their slippers missing. all the girls' slippers were tied to a string that stretches from A block to B block.

hw hw hw! i dun care. i'm goin into hiding.
but tt doesnt mean i'm always on defensive mode. (=

brain

its over.
our finishing line.

but i'm sadly happy.

brain.

there are just some things tt i have to settle myself.
no one can help me, except myself.
finally, had the courage to do so.

brain.

i do nt wish to continue denying.
its maturity vs emotions.
nv been really controllin hw i really feel. been tryin really hard to hide it, even to the extent of suppressing it.

too bad, pple nv really listened.
too bad, pple nv been really sensitive.
too bad, pple dont understand.
too bad, its all your fault.

i have no one to blame, but myself.

brain.

"...
and i had enough of you, bitch."

is tt what i wana hear. is tt what i am.
whatever.
i am who i am.

leti

i have approximately a week before sem 2 starts. another evil sem.
pple were reflecting on their new year resolutions. as for your dearest brain here, she's gona say this to herself: u noe what is right and what is wrong.

IHG-inter-hall games started alr! wed was tennis. wooohoo.
did a report for the KR basketball girls yest night. both men and women won. *celebrates!

i duno why, but i always tired. haha. pig out!

can you believe it!! OMGosh. IHG netball is next tue! up against TH-Temasek Hall. hai hai HAI.
touch rug IHG(carnival based) has been brought forward to late jan!! volleyball is in feb. badminton and soccer- i duno. haa.

bidding is gona start. my heart cant take it.

mental block.
wil update moree, next time.

brain.

GONE.

gone were the days
the days where we would have small talks before sleeping.
the days where we would bicker over the smallest thing in the world.
the days where we would shop like nobody's business.
the days where we would bake ugly muffins/cupcakes/watsoever.
the days where we would flock to the mega sales.
the days where we would eat at posh restaurants n regret eating after that.
the days where we would
the days where we would be late for almost everything.
the days where we would pig out anytime, anywhere, any o how
the days where we had fun together.

those were the days.

GONE.

gone were the days.
the days where we would have small talks before sleeping.
the days where we would bicker over the smallest thing in the world.
the days where we would shop like nobody's business.
the days where we would watch fantastic plays or last-minute movies.
the days where we would reminisce childhood events.
the days where we would flock to the mega sales.
the days where we would bake ugly cupcakes/muffins/watsoever.
the days where we would eat at posh restaurants n regret eating after that.
the days where we would be late for almost everything.
the days where we would pig out at anywhere, anytime, any o how.
the days where we had fun together.

those were the days.